Pianissimo

I don't know if I've mentioned it, but I play the flute in a community orchestra. I also play piano for a community choir. This sounds impressive until I say that the conductor is the same for both, the orchestra is small and enthusiastic at best, and the choir is tiny (but with a lot of heart).

A few years ago I decided that I needed a hobby. So, I started playing the flute again. Practiced like mad, and approached the local orchestra in a very scared state of mind. Like most things in my working and non-working life (it's a curse), this has evolved to my being board president of that growing-but-struggling group, and, after suggesting that the conductor couldn't really conduct both groups on the same night, playing piano for a growing-but-struggling choir. How do I get myself into these messes?

That said, I'm not sure what's gotten into my conductor lately. It's not a bad thing--he's trying to improve us musically (and we need that). But, really, I'm not in middle school and don't need lectures. I do understand dynamics, and can do them when I'm not trying to figure out what tempo you want us to do it this time, or wondering what the heck the strings are up to. And, really, it's not necessary to tell the choir to sing louder by telling the eight whole members that the orchestra members are amateurs and CAN'T play more quietly. I did play for another group this past summer, and I know that it doesn't have to be this way.

The long and short of it is that I'm really ready to move on. I want to be part of a better group. But, I like these people. While the conductor is looking for greatness, I kind of see it as a group of local musicians who like to get together and play. So, I'll stick around. It's fun. As board president, I have control of what we play. I can play first flute or second flute or piccolo or whatever-the-heck part I want. I might double up and play with another group, but, really, why give up a good gig? Pianissimo is a musical term, but keeping quiet about the group-related drama of it all is a pretty universally respected thing.

And that's my silver lining for today.